12 Edible Valentine's Day Gifts That Don't Suck

Edible Valentine's gifts have come a long way since the days of rock-hard assorted chocolates. Why not take advantage of the wide world of Valentine's Day promotions to present a unique gift to your sweetheart? This year, skip the nougat and treat your partner to something with a little more oomph. Here's a list of 12 inspiring ideas.

Roses wilt and tulips droop, but pickles are forever. Well, not forever—but you'll certainly get more utility out of a pickle bouquet than a bunch of wimpy flowers. Allow The Takeout to recommend Grillo's make-your-own pickle bouquet kit, available for $20. Each kit includes a coupon for a free jar of Grillo's pickles, along with 15 wooden pickle skewers, a card and card holder, tissue paper and filler, and a custom Valentine's Day jar label. All kits can be purchased on Grillos' website.

Let's be clear: There's certainly nothing wrong with a classic heart-shaped box of chocolates. Ferrero Rochet Valentine's Day Boxes, for example, are always a hit. But the chocolate industry is notoriously evil, which is why we recommend pivoting to direct trade chocolate. Not only is direct trade chocolate more ethically sourced, it's also, in many cases, very fancy to look at. Take Askinosie Chocolate's signature Valentine's Chocolate Tasting Kit, which includes everything you need to host your own chocolate tasting date, including tasting notes and a flavor wheel. (Or try something else from the Askinosie Valentine's collection.)

What's more romantic than a daily caffeinated reminder of your love? Coffee subscriptions are exactly what they sound like: weekly, bi-weekly, or monthly deliveries of the coffee bean of your choice, shipped right to your door. Plenty of smaller coffee operations offer monthly bean deliveries nationwide, and you can typically customize your subscription, whether you'd like to schedule a one-time delivery, a monthly delivery, or even a weekly delivery. Here's a good one to try from Nguyen Coffee Supply.

With recent advancements in food transport technology (read: tons of dry ice), you can get iconic foods shipped from anywhere—and it's a particularly romantic gesture to order something for your Valentine that they can't get where they live. Send them this Magnolia Bakery Date Night Sampler Pack, which includes two cups of Chocolate Covered Strawberry Pudding and two Valentine's cupcakes. Decadence, baby! Decadence!

Dazzle your lover by arranging frozen seafood in a stunning bouquet. This year, the Maine Lobster Marketing Collaborative is bringing back its popular $99 Maine Lobster Tail Bouquet yet again, because it understands what Valentine's Day is all about. Each kit features what the Collaborative calls "The Sweetest Lobster on Earth," with half a dozen 4-oz. lobster tails and an order of clam chowder for two. Plus, you can style your bouquet with skewers, festive wax paper, a burlap wrap, and an original Maine Lobster Valentine tag.

What could be more romantic than the aroma of a Hardee's biscuit? The fast food brand is celebrating the season by not only bringing back its beloved Heart-Shaped Biscuits from February 11-14, but also debuting an entirely new Valentine's treat: the Heart-Shaped Cherry Filled Biscuit. These treats are only available during breakfast hours, but as many of you know, breakfast in bed is the greatest gift of all.

You should know by now that tinned fish is the best, whether you're putting it to use as a delicious snack, a pasta protein, or a general all-purpose kitchen staple. And these Tinned Fish Gourmet Gift Packs from DECANTsf let you create an elegant board for you and your date at home—yes, the gift pack can even add on the board itself, if you so choose. As a bonus, the kits can be sent with a handwritten note.

Ice cream is a sweet surprise for long-term couples, but it's also a low-commitment gift idea if you're still feeling out the relationship. It says "thinking of you," but it's also whimsical enough to avoid any hint of Swimfan-style obsessive sentiments. Fortunately, there's still time to ship your dearest a gigantic box filled with sugary delights. For example, Jeni's is currently offering a specially curated Valentine's Day collection, which costs $68 for six pints plus $15 in shipping. The lovey-dovey flavors include Brambleberry Crisp, Gooey Butter Cake, Wildberry Lavender, Honey Vanilla Bean, Cookies in Cream, and Salted Peanut Butter with Chocolate Flecks.

Looking for the way to a Midwesterner's corn-fed heart? Quit mingling and get kringling. The many-layered pastry known as kringle is rich, buttery, and deeply, deeply Midwestern. If you're not sure where to start, O&H Danish Bakery in Racine, Wisconsin has tons of Valentine's Day offerings, including heart-shaped kringle in both cherry and pecan flavors for $26.49 each plus shipping. Other treats include hand-dipped petit fours and a red velvet coffee cake.

If you'd like to dazzle your crush with a heart-shaped pile of cheese, sauce, and dough, look no further than the following retailers. Order carryout or put on your best duds for a dine-out date night.

• California Pizza Kitchen has a Valentine's Day Sweet Deal for Two for dine-in, takeout, or delivery. Choose between the Classic ($40) or Adventure ($50) from February 9-14.
• Papa Johns is back with a heart-shaped thin-crust pizza that includes one topping of your choice. It's important to note that the pie comes unsliced!
• Papa Murphy's is back with its signature "HeartBaker" pizza this year, available for $11 through Valentine's Day.

Chicken nuggets are a perfect food, and on Cupid's special day you can treat your loved one to a big ol' sack of Tyson's Nuggets of Love. These heart-shaped chicken bites are now available for a limited time at select retailers nationwide. They'd probably pair nicely with some Pink Sauce.

If your Valentine isn't a heart-shaped-box-of-chocolates person, you can always treat them to a bit o' booze. Online spirits marketplace ReserveBar has a nice Valentine's Day gift guide full of pre-assembled kits, like this candy and wine package. These options are also a splendid way to treat yourself if you choose to ignore Cupid's fanfare and kick it solo on February 14.