Topo Chico Hard Seltzer is here, and with it, our renewed sense of hope

Product shot of Topo Chico Hard Seltzer [image provided by Molson Coors]
Image: Molson Coors

Everyone loves Topo Chico. It’s the Platonic ideal of bubbly water, the one that gets people excited. Whereas LaCroix and Spindrift and Polar and Bubly all have their loyal customers, there’s something about finding glass bottles of Topo in the wild that feels like you’ve stumbled upon the grocery store grand prize. So when we first heard back in July that Topo Chico was releasing a hard seltzer in Latin America inspired by its flagship mineral water product, we experienced a deep sense of FOMO. Later on, in September, it was confirmed that the product would make its U.S. debut in “the first half of 2021,” a timeframe that felt frustratingly noncommittal in the midst of a pandemic with nothing else to get excited about. But now, the wait is over: Topo Chico Hard Seltzer hits shelves stateside on March 29.

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Here’s the rundown on flavors (emphasis ours):

Topo Chico® Hard Seltzer blends purified spiked sparkling water, natural flavors, with minerals added for a crisp, refreshing finish. Topo Chico® Hard Seltzer will be available in four flavors including: Tangy Lemon Lime, Exotic Pineapple, Strawberry Guava and Tropical Mango, and will retail in four-flavor, 12-pack Variety Pack (Slim Can), two 24oz singles, and one 16oz single can.

I’d just like pause for a minute and point out that there’s no law on the books dictating that spiked seltzers must be in a slim can. What is the rationale here? To make us feel like we’re making the “slim” choice? I like the heft of a classic 12-ounce can, personally. I don’t like being able to touch my thumb and forefinger around the circumference of a hard seltzer can. But I digress.

It’s unclear what makes the pineapple exotic or the mango any more tropical than usual, but these four flavors sound delicious (provided they don’t skew too sweet), and some consumers might be interested to know that it’s slightly less spiked than the average hard seltzer—Truly and White Claw are 5% ABV, while Topo clocks in at 4.7%.

The new drink will be appearing in a wide swath of test markets at the end of this month before rolling out nationwide. Lucky shoppers in nine states and seven metro areas will see Topo Chico Hard Seltzer first: Texas, Oklahoma, Colorado, California, New Mexico, Oregon, Arizona, Georgia, and Florida, as well as Seattle Metro and Vancouver (Washington), New York City, Northern New Jersey, Boston (and Surrounding Metro), Cape Cod, Washington DC, and the Chicago Metro area. To keep up with the ongoing rollout, you can head to their website or Instagram.

DISCUSSION

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Jim is one of KFCs secret ingredients

Is this going to have that godawful fake sweetener aftertaste like all the other hard seltzers?