Billy Durney of Hometown Bar-B-Que stands onstage during the Food Network & Cooking Channel New York City Wine & Food Festival in NYC in 2018.
Photo: Noam Galai (Getty Images)

You’d better love a food brand if you’re going to tattoo its logo on your body. Arby’s tried this, giving away free tattoos—but no free food—to those willing to be inked with art of the Arby’s name or signature beef and cheddar sandwiches. The Domino’s Russia tattoo promotion was even sweeter, offering tattoo recipients free Domino’s pizza for life in exchange for that permanent ink. (Ultimately, the Domino’s deal proved too popular, and the company had to end it after an overwhelming response.)

Now, The Wichita Eagle brings us news that a 58-year-old diner regular tattooed that diner’s name inside a cheeseburger on his forearm in exchange for free burgers for life. Ty’s Diner had reportedly offered this deal for more than a year with no takers, until its owners asked regular customer Mark Klamm if he was interested. He agreed, joking that he might be going through a midlife crisis.

This started The Takeout staff talking: What branded food item would you tattoo on your body—in a reasonably visible place—in exchange for free food? We’re not talking artistic renderings of radishes or a cartoony hot dog, but corporate food items, with a name brand or logo. I immediately thought of Taylor Provisions-brand breakfast ham, which is not only delicious but is also synonymous with my home state of New Jersey. Or maybe I’d go with the Miller High Life girl-in-the-moon logo in homage to one of my favorite yellow fizzy beers. Surely there are more than a couple Whataburger, Dairy Queen, or Cheetos tattoos out there—so what would your branded food tattoo be?

Naturally, if you already have such a tattoo, we request to see the photos (PG-rated only, please) in the comments.