Hello and good morning. It’s January 17, 2020, and today we’re thinking about MC Hammer again. Yes, the ’90s rapper with the parachute pants. Who will be in a 2020 Cheetos Super Bowl commercial. In it, the Frito-Lay brand imagines the role Cheetos played in hip-hop history: it’s 1989, and MC Hammer sits in front of the piano, fingers covered in Cheedust (that’s what it’s called, that’s canon), then realizes, “I can’t touch this.”
Boom. That’s $2.5 million dollars of Frito-Lay ad spending, here for your consumption. It’s unclear why the Oakland native is relevant to the 2020 Super Bowl — it’s being played in Miami, and the Raiders certainly aren’t in it. Also, are we meant to believe that Hammer wrote “U Can’t Touch This” on the piano and didn’t just directly rip Rick James’ “Superfreak”? Hm.
In any case, good for Hammer for getting that check. After making his name in hip-hop over 30 years ago, he’s has had a bit of, well, a journey. After winning three Grammys in 1990, he’s released an album every few years, to little notice. In 2009, he starred on Hammertime, a reality show on A&E about himself and his family that ran got canceled after one season. In 2013, he released “Raider Nation,” a theme for his beloved NFL team, which will be moving to Las Vegas next season. At least now he’s got cash for all those flights to Nevada.