Last Call: If A Beyond Burger Can Be Sexy, Anything Can Be Sexy

Yandy, that company that gave us the Sexy Mister Rogers costume, has now rolled out the Sexy Beyond Burger and the Sexy White Claw—pardon, Sexy Hard Outlaw—because of course they have. What is sexier than fake meat or boozy seltzer? I think they can do better.

There are so many things in this world that are sexier than the Beyond Burger. There's the Impossible Burger, for one. And who wouldn't want to be a sexy McRib or a sexy Popeye's Chicken Sandwich or a sexy stalk of asparagus? Help us out here.