A date that was part of a running column in The Boston Globe sparks an intriguing question about first date dinner etiquette: Must you share food with your date?
The news outlet invites readers to apply to be set up on a blind date paid for by the publication. After the date, The Boston Globe interviews the participants and publishes a quick summary of how it all went.
Unfortunately Eileen and Mason, this week’s daters, did not make a romantic connection that would stand the test of time. Their connection barely made it through the date itself. Mason described Eileen’s look as “crunchy” and not his “preferred style” while Eileen described Mason as “reserved” saying she prefers someone more open. Though the two shared some common interests (cooking and travel), the chemistry was lacking and did not go beyond polite small talk.
As they reached the end of the date Eileen told The Boston Globe, “I always feel awkward being the only one who wants dessert, so I was relieved he wanted to get dessert.” Eileen had tiramisu and Mason ordered bread pudding. However, Mason told The Boston Globe, “I offered her a taste and she wasn’t interested. She never offered me a taste of her tiramisu.”
Hey Mason, if you wanted to try the tiramisu so bad why didn’t you just order it? To some that might come off as rude, but remember this is a first date. Plus, they weren’t even getting along that well.
Sharing food off your plate with someone is much more intimate than it may seem. When I eat with my mom we often share food off our plates with each other without even really having to ask. But that’s my mother. Mason here expects a woman he just met and whom he’s already described as “crunchy” and not his type to share her food with him.
I understand that he offered her a bite of his dessert first, but that was his choice. Yes, it was a polite, albeit kind gesture but that does not mean she is required to reciprocate the offer. She also politely declined the bite, anyway. My point is this: Your date does not have to let you have a bite of their food no matter how good it looks to you. If you’ve been dating for a while and reached a certain level of comfortability then that’s a different story, but you especially shouldn’t expect a bite of someone’s food when you just met them.
Do you expect someone to share food on a first date? Let us know in the comments.