Trump administration vows to ban marshmallow-flavored vapes

Photo: Laboko (iStock)

Yesterday the Trump administration announced it will try to ban the sale of all non-tobacco flavored e-cigarettes. As someone who became addicted to nicotine at the age of 12, this is a policy I can actually get behind. I cannot count the number of times I tried and failed to quit smoking—even with patches, gums, and prescriptions, the physical need for cigarettes was so vicious that it’s impossible to convey to someone who has never experienced it. I finally kicked the habit a decade ago by going cold turkey, forcing myself into such excruciating withdrawal that the pain still resonates in my body. I have recurring nightmares in which I am smoking once again, understanding just one teeny-tiny pull is all that would be necessary to thrust me back into a pack-a-day habit. And yet, as I type all these horrible memories, even after 10 years there’s a part of my brain that could really go for a cigarette right now.

In banning these nicotine products, which are available in a myriad of fruit- and candy-inspired flavors, the federal government hopes to put a quick end to the epidemic of mysterious vape-related deaths, which currently stands at at six.

“It’s very dangerous. Children have died. People have died,” Trump said, promising that he would enact “strong rules and regulations.” E-cigarettes are already regulated to keep them out of children’s hands—no one under the age of 18 is allowed to purchase them in any of the 50 states, and several states have already adopted a national push to ban sales to anyone under the age of 21. Trump’s proposed ban will apply to all Americans, regardless of their age.

But fear not if you’re an adult who prefers their vices candy-covered, because America still has plenty of those you can get in on:

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About the author

Allison Robicelli

Allison Robicelli is The Takeout staff writer, a former professional chef, host of The Robicelli Argument Clinic Podcast, the author of three books, and a swan meat influencer.