Does anyone remember the Great Twitter Charcuterie Controversy of August, 2020? That was approximately 8,264 years ago in pandemic time, so to refresh your memory, that was when Twitter learned that charcuterie, despite its fancy French name, is not just for rich people. Imagine that: a meal with a French name and multiple components can be purchased for less than $20 at your local Costco!
Now Better Homes & Gardens has a charcuterie innovation that will truly blow your mind: a holiday charcuterie house. Gingerbread, after all, is so passé (and, as I’ve learned from watching The Great British Baking Show, prone to collapse). And people have so much more free time now—or so magazine writers claim. Of course if your construction skills are lacking, you can use a premade gingerbread house as a base for your meat and cheese, but BH&G advises you to warn your family in advance in case they don’t like the combination of gingerbread and prosciutto. (To which we say, don’t knock it till you’ve tried it.)
BH&G provides no specific instructions for building a charcuterie house besides looking up other charcuterie houses on Instagram. It appears the breadstick or pretzel log cabin model is a popular one, though some people have had success with crackers. Trader Joe’s Gingerbread Crisps may also work nicely. As for mortar, I guess cheese spread would work? But what do I know? I’ve never built anything more complicated with food than a mashed potatoes anthill.
A safety note from BH&G: store your house in the fridge! Meat and cheese weren’t meant to sit out for days at a time for visitors to admire.
If any of you have ever built a charcuterie house, please share your tips in the comments. Inquiring minds want to know.