Photo: McDonalds/Tom Kelley via Getty Images

Jan 8. update: The bottle has been recovered! Latest development at bottom of story.

The Associated Press today reported that thieves in Copenhagen stole from a bar a bottle of vodka valued at $1.3 million, said to be the world’s most expensive. The story is relatively thin on details, and the ones it includes raise more questions.

For starters: “Denmark’s TV2 says the bottle of Russo-Baltique is made of 3 kilograms (6.6. pounds) of gold and the equivalent amount of silver with a diamond-encrusted cap.”

Uh, and that thing was just lying around, not under lock and key? I guess the owners of Bar 33 assumed the 6 pounds of gold, silver, and diamonds would be fairly inconspicuous. The bar reportedly has 1,200 bottles of vodka in its possession, so perhaps it blended in. (Aside: Russo-Baltique is a vodka made by a Russian car company and apparently it appeared in an episode of House Of Cards.)

Moving on: The bar owner “said the bottle was uninsured and on loan from a Russian businessman.”

Oh well this is a doozy in the vein of a James Bond knockoff. I mean, what is more stereotypically heist-movie than an unnamed businesses man, diamonds, and vodka? Here’s hoping they catch the thieves as they’re boarding a caviar-laden submarine.

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Updated January 8, 2018

The New York Times reports today that the now-most-famous bottle of vodka in the world has been recovered, albeit empty, and with a nasty dent: “The vessel was found at the entrance to a building site in Charlottenlund, an affluent district north of the Danish capital.”

Before that though, Brian Ingberg, who owns the bar the bottle was stolen from, reports that “he had been contacted by a man who said that he knew who had the bottle and that the thief wanted to return it to the collector,” the “Russian businessman” referred to above.

“I got the feeling that he felt he was in trouble because of the police and Leon in Russia wanting to send people out to look for it,” Mr. Ingberg said, referring to Leonard F. Yankelovich, Dartz’s founder and the actual owner of the bottle. “It’s not the most fun item to possess.”

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Ingberg is relieved that the famous container has been returned, but it turns out was never really that worried about the bottle’s fate: “I trust the god of vodka.”