I’ve lived in Chicago for a few years now, but I still don’t really care for deep dish. I’m much more drawn to New York pizza culture, with its folded slices and paper plates and shiny, shiny cheese. Problem is, if you’re not careful on New York’s mean streets, someone is liable to snatch your slice. And that someone might just be a renegade wild turkey with a taste for mozzarella.
Staten Island’s wild turkey population has long been the stuff of legend. But last Sunday morning, Staten Island Advance reporter Kyle Lawson spotted a flock chowing down on a big ol’ slice of ‘za. If you check out the video below, you’ll see the turkey trotting across a city street with its pizza bounty in hand. (Well, in beak. The pizza is in the turkey’s beak.)
There’s no word yet on where the turkey acquired the pizza. Did it shell out a few bucks from its turkey wallet? Did the flock jump an unsuspecting restaurant patron, leaving their victim pizza-less and bleeding behind a dumpster? According to the Advance, anything’s possible—it seems that turkeys have been a nuisance on the East Shore for years. The Advance reports that turkeys “have caused traffic holdups in the area, blocked Staten Island University Hospital emergency room entrances and scared residents from leaving their homes.” I mean, I can’t really blame the turkeys here. A strong pizza craving can reduce anyone to their baser, more animalistic instincts. Let’s just hope this particular flock opted out of fowl play.