Photo: marcoprati (iStock)

A onetime deputy of the El Paso County Sheriff’s Department (Colorado, not Texas) has been sentenced to six years in prison. His crime: Smuggling methamphetamine into jail. His method: Hide it in mashed potato substance.

According to The Gazette, 35-year-old Steven D’Agostino, who was sentenced Wednesday, would go to “arranged meetings with inmates’ associates to pick up the drugs concealed in food. Then he would bring the food into the jail and distribute the drugs to inmates—collecting $1,500 for each exchange.”


The arrest affidavit states that on the day of D’Agostino’s arrest, a woman dropped off a KFC order for him. The order included mashed potatoes, naturally, and in the mashed potatoes was “a blue balloon containing 7.5 grams of methamphetamine.”

He got fired, obviously. And who disrespects mashed potatoes (or even mashed potato substance) like that?

Contributor, The A.V. Club and The Takeout. Allison loves television, bourbon, and dramatically overanalyzing social interactions.

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