New Samsung Robot Loads The Dishwasher, Probably Costs More Than 10 Dishwashers

After a lifetime of fearing the existential threat of robots, I might finally be coming around to the possibility of accepting them into my home and my heart. Why am I considering a pledge of fealty to our inevitable oppressors? A friendly little fellow called the Bot Handy, which can pick dirty laundry up off the floor, clean the sink, and load the dishwasher. These are simple tasks that I have no motivation to do, which is why I make my kids do them. Alas, one day they'll go off to live lives of their own, at which point I'll need to replace them with robots.

The new Samsung Bot™ Handy, which is currently in development, uses advanced AI technology to identify and pick up objects; after scanning and analyzing any object in its path, the robot will be able to use the appropriate amount of force to grab and move objects based on their material composition. It shall be, as the company said in a press release, "an extension of you," and will be "your trusted partner to help with house chores like cleaning up messy rooms or sorting out the dishes after a meal." I believe Samsung is implying that the Bot Handy could potentially become my new robot sidekick, a loyal companion who will spend its days making my life easier, allowing me to spend more of my precious time watching television on any one of the 5,000 streaming platforms that will emerge in our near future.

Samsung did not reveal when the Bot Handy will move out of the testing stage and into the retail market, nor how much it will cost. I'm going to take a wild guess and say it will be way out of my price range, so I suppose I'll need to befriend other, more menacing robots to help me rob a bank in pursuit of my dream to never pick things up again. For once, I am optimistic about the future.