Prince William has been caught staring at breasts

Close-up of Prince William speaking into a camera
Royals only want one thing and it’s disgusting.
Image: Comic Relief (Getty Images)

Royals: They’re just like us. That is, they’re easily distracted by fried chicken, as evidenced by a recent paparazzi photo of Prince William gazing through the window of a KFC near Waterloo Station in London. Naturally, the KFC Twitter account seized the opportunity to tweet some groaners.

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According to ET Canada, the Duke was photographed while out with his wife, Kate Middleton, for an official event. There’s no way of knowing what Prince William saw in that KFC, but I imagine the dialogue between the two probably went like this:

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Kate: Cheerio, dear husband—what in the name of the Archbishop of Canterbury are you staring at?

Will: Pip-pip, darling! I spy a breast most fowl.

Kate: Charmed, I’m sure! Let’s put on our wellies and go watch acclaimed BBC series Call the Midwife.

Will: Quite right!

We’ll probably never know why Prince William felt compelled to gaze into that KFC. Perhaps it’s part of an elaborate bid to be cast as the first-ever British Colonel Sanders, which would place the Duke among true royalty—Jason Alexander, Ray Liotta, and, of course, Reba McEntire. Perhaps the Duke simply skipped his afternoon tea and was hungry. Only question remains: Is Prince William a breast man or a leg man?

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Staff writer @ The Takeout. Pork shoulder princess @ Chicago.

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DISCUSSION

scotz
Dream Theater of the Absurd

Prince William has been caught staring at breasts

IOW, Prince William is just a guy like the rest of us guys (the straight ones, at least).... oh, wait, this is about chicken!

Serves me right for not reading the article first.  And in that respect, I’m more of a thigh man.