President’s mental stability offered as sign that U.S. beef is safe from mad cow disease

Illustration for article titled President’s mental stability offered as sign that U.S. beef is safe from mad cow disease
Photo: Mark Wilson (Getty Images)

As the U.S. and China participate in trade talks, Commerce Secretary Wilbur Ross was quick to attempt to assuage concerns that U.S. beef was tainted by mad cow disease. After all, The New York Post points out, “China had banned imports on U.S. beef since 2003 over concerns of mad cow disease. It wasn’t until 2017 that China received its first new shipment of U.S. beef after an easing of some restrictions.”


To soothe the fears of the Chinese, “Ross shot down concerns raised by the Chinese in recent trade talks that American beef was tainted with mad cow disease and hailed Trump’s mental health as proof the meat is safe.” Ross told the National Press Club on Monday:

I pointed out to them that both the president and I eat quite a lot of American beef. And other than the fact that we’re in public office, there are no signs of mental instability as a result.

Apparently Ross doesn’t follow his boss very closely on Twitter? To make a persuasive argument to the Chinese, hopefully Ross also submitted some USDA reports or actual science in addition to offering himself and Trump up as the very pictures of mental health.

Gwen Ihnat is the Editorial Coordinator for The A.V. Club.



Chinese: “Your beef is tinged with madness and fury.”

US: “No way. Our President Beef is healthy and prime.”


US: “Uh, would you be interested in our other offerings? We have literal shit tons of corn syrup.”

Chinese: “Your diabetes syrup makes you old and feeble.”

US: “No, our President swims in Diet Coke and he is strong of body!”

President: *huff* *huff* “Just a little more. I tell you we need some longer straws.” *puff* *wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeezzzzzzzzzzzzzzzee*