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Oscar Mayer has a way with H-I-R-I-N-G D-R-I-V-E-R-S

Illustration for article titled Oscar Mayer has a way with H-I-R-I-N-G D-R-I-V-E-R-S
Photo: John Lamparski/WireImage (Getty Images)

When opportunity knocks, it might sound more like a clunky novelty winnebago trundling down the interstate. But nevertheless, you heed the call.

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According to an Instagram post this week, Oscar Mayer, that most American of tube meat purveyors, has opened up applications to be one of their esteemed “hotdoggers,” brand ambassadors who criss-cross the country in an iconic hot-dog-shaped vehicle, the Wienermobile, and are “ready to deliver unlimited joy to thousands of people every single day.”

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Hotdoggers do a lot more than pose for photos with excited children, which is probably why Oscar Mayer is specifically seeking energetic recent college grads for this full-time 1-year assignment. Essentially, a hotdogger is a company spokesperson, representing Oscar Mayer in media appearances, charity events, brand promotions, and “meat and greets,” handing out Wiener Whistles by the hundreds and pitching coverage ideas to local news outlets. All while maintaining and piloting one hell of a company car.

Those interested in the opportunity of a lifetime can apply here. You’d better believe that even in job listings, the company’s puns are bountiful (bun-tiful? I am deeply sorry).

Marnie Shure is editor in chief of The Takeout.

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DISCUSSION

If they were looking for recently retired college professors, my brother would probably jump on it. He just finished teaching branding at the graduate level and loves any and all advertising mascots. He has a full size Big Boy in his garden. It’s actually his second. The first one was decapitated by a tree during Hurricane Isabelle. His house has a parking pad the previous own used for an RV and I’ve been campaigning for him to fill it with a Wienermobile, much to the chagrin of my sister-in-law.