You thought a box of Russel Stovers and some flowers were going to cut it? Please. This Valentine’s Day, the must-have gift—if you live in Britain, at least—is the Love Sausage. Do not adjust your screen; you read that correctly.
British chain Marks & Spencer this week debuted the heart-shaped, bacon-wrapped Love Sausage via a Twitter announcement that encourages lovebirds to “say it with sausage.” Ostensibly, this is just a comically bent sausage link, so perhaps they can market this as “Sausage Canes” at Christmas or “Umbrella Sausage” during rainy season. But nothing is more enticing than surprising your secret crush with a love sausage.
Mere hours after this tweet was posted, every possible joke has already been made. The GIFs have been GIF’d. There is nothing left to say. “Tag who you’ll be sharing your Love Sausage with this Valentine’s Day!” Marks & Spencer tee’d this thing up like an internet Wiffle ball.
For those still here, reading about the Love Sausage, it is described as “heart-shaped, lightly-truffled, wrapped in bacon.” It will be available in stores tomorrow, so now’s the time to text that special someone. Remember, love is a many splendored thing. Say it with sausage.