I’m on my annual clear-out-the-house kick in preparation of my neighborhood’s annual garage sale next month, While going through a bunch of boxes I haven’t touched since we moved two years ago, I came across what I would like to call “the ’90s box.” Love letters, ticket stubs, old datebooks, and most importantly, photos I had forgotten that ever existed. I could hardly believe myself looking at them. I showed them to my son and he gasped, “That’s you? You were so pretty!”

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Yes, the tense is hurtful (my daughter, tossing me a bone, says she likes the way I look better now, as my forehead was the wrong size before, whatever that means), but he was absolutely right. I almost gasped myself at the pictures of twentysomething me. In Clueless terms, I definitely resembled one of those “Botticelli babes.” A mysterious smile, near-perfect skin, really impressive eyebrows (I had forgotten); 1990s me could have been the new short, curvy neighbor guest-starring on a Melrose Place episode.

What kills me, though, is that I know that my appearance plagued me as much then as it does now. I probably looked at those pictures at the time and saw only 10 pounds (or more) to lose, a near-invisible blemish, a sweater I hated. I never thought I was beautiful, even when (I have photographic evidence!) I actually was.

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This is a super-long way of saying that I get why some people have issues with Amy Schumer’s I Feel Pretty, but when I saw it last week, I totally got what Schumer was trying to do. In fact, I nearly cried. Maybe it was because I had just found that ’90s box, but I liked Schumer’s movie a lot more than the reviews had led me to believe I would. Yes, there’s no reason for Schumer to disparage her own appearance as an ugly duckling with a head injury. But in a way, that’s the whole point. We’re all perfect the way we are: right now, right this very second. I dearly wish I could go back and tell twentysomething me that very thing, and I’m happy if I Feel Pretty helps spread that message to people besides myself and Schumer’s new BFF Oprah. [Gwen Ihnat]


Michael Jackson performs “Human Nature” live at Wembley Stadium

I had no idea Toto wrote and performed the backing instrumental of “Human Nature” on Michael Jackson’s Thriller album. Once I heard the synthesizers and chord changes, it made all the sense in the world. Here’s a live version of that song from 1988. [Kevin Pang]