Canned wine is here to stay, and grocery store shelves are now full of myriad options in cute cans of all colors and sizes. On the teenie end, we have choices like Sophia Coppola Minis, which contain just 6.3 ounces and come with an adorable straw. On the jumbo side, a press release informs us that Krogers in Ohio and Kentucky now offer 16.9-ounce “shareable” cans from WineSociety, which contains “four servings” that you can “consume responsibly” with your “friends.” Sure.
The California grape blends are definitely not intended for you to consume alone straight from the can while watching Bridget Jones’s Diary and wondering how long those houseplants have been dead, then drunkenly stumbling to the kitchen to eat shredded cheese straight from the bag. Why would you even think that?
No, these cans are for pouring into “proper glassware” while enjoying a “quiet night in” with “friends.” Definitely not for shotgunning 5 minutes before your Lyft arrives to drag you to another heinous blind date that you neglected to even wash your hair for. No. Definitely not for that.
Should you so lucky as to have dozens of “friends” that you invite to many “dinner parties,” WineSociety has your back with cases of these tallboy wines. You social butterfly, you.