When I move from one city or state to another, it’s always the food I miss. I long for the New Jersey bagels of my youth and the fresh tortillas I took for granted in Phoenix. If an airline could plop those fresh goodies on my doorstep, well, I might just shed tears of joy. It’s not bagels or tortillas that JetBlue will soon deliver, though, but fresh New York pizza from East Harlem institution Patsy’s Pizzeria.
According to JetBlue’s website, from May 9 to 11, the airline will deliver 350 fresh Patsy’s pies from New York to LA for the completely reasonable price of $12 for a cheese pizza and $15 for a pepperoni pie. If you’re one of the lucky Angelinos to sign up beginning at midnight on May 9, JetBlue will not just fly the pie to your city but will deliver it to your doorstep. According to the FAQs, you won’t even need to tip the driver. And we’re not talking about a frozen, bake-it-yourself pie, either: JetBlue promises the pizza will be delivered hot to your door thanks to “a designated pizzaiolo (a specially trained pizza chef) [who] has overseen the logistics of the pizza’s journey.”
Clearly this is a promotional marketing stunt, but it’s a pretty damn good one. It also raises a gigantic question in my mind: If airlines can do this, why the hell are they not doing it all the time? As I mentioned before, I will pay handsomely for food I’ve been unable to find locally. On my last trip to Phoenix, I specifically packed my carry-on to ensure I’d be able to stuff its pockets full of fresh tortillas. (Then the TSA promptly unpacked and searched that shit.) How much would I pay for a still-warm New Jersey bagel sandwich with Taylor Ham? I’m not too proud to find out. Delta, maybe get on that?