Jesus Christ is appearing on potatoes again

Jesus, left, and a sack of non-sacred potatoes, right
Jesus, left, and a sack of non-sacred potatoes, right
Photo: Jörg Mikus / EyeEm (Getty Images), inhauscreative (Getty Images)

If this year has made you wonder if God has abandoned us, fear not! He is most definitely still here, and to reassure us of His existence, He has once again sent to us His only begotten son... in a potato.


The Bristol Post reports that Nikki Halkerston, a woman from Dundee, Scotland, recently found Jesus Christ hiding in a £1.15 sack of potatoes from Aldi.

“As soon as I put the packet on the kitchen top I saw it,” said Halkerston. “I was staring at it and it was just quite obvious it was Jesus’ face. It was just looking at me.”

Halkerston then asked her husband, who she says is normally skeptical about such things, to evaluate the possibly sacred potato. He agreed that the spots on the potato looked very much like Jesus.

It’s unclear whether or not God had planned for the potato to deliver us from evil, but if that was the plan then humankind is completely screwed, as Halkerston admits she has eaten the potato.

Allison Robicelli is a writer, recipe czar, former professional chef, author of four (quite good) books, and The People's Hot Pocket Princess. Tweet me for recipe help: @Robicellis.


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