Hey Fred Savage, is a hot dog a sandwich?

Illustration for article titled Hey Fred Savage, is a hot dog a sandwich?
Photo: Steve Mack, Illustration: Natalie Peeples
Is A Hot Dog A Sandwich?Is A Hot Dog A Sandwich?Welcome to Is A Hot Dog A Sandwich? in which The Takeout asks famous and important people to answer the most important question to ever beguile the human race.

What would you do if someone asked you if a hot dog was a sandwich?

Would you stand there and answer thoughtfully?

Lend me your eyes and I’ll type out what Fred Savage said.

I will try not to hit the wrong keys.

Child Support is a game show in which adults attempt to answer questions to win money. If they get a question wrong, the question then goes to a room full of children and Ricky Gervais. If the kids answer correctly, the adults get the credit. It is hosted by Fred Savage, and returns to ABC on Friday, October 5 at 9 p.m.

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The Takeout: Is a hot dog a sandwich?

Fred Savage: No.

TO: That is an emphatic no. Why not?

FS: Because a sandwich has a top and a bottom. A hot dog has a side, and a side.

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TO: So the issue is horizontal vs. vertical?

FS: It has to have a top, and a bottom, and two open sides. So I would argue that even a hoagie, if it’s not sliced all the way through, then that’s a hot dog.

TO: A hoagie is a hot dog?

FS: I guess it’s a hot dog. A sandwich has got to have open sides, and a roof and a floor. Anything else is something else.

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Contributor, The A.V. Club and The Takeout. Allison loves television, bourbon, and dramatically overanalyzing social interactions.

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DISCUSSION

babbylonian
Babbylonian

A hoagie is a hot dog? Fred, seriously, get help. Something is wrong and I’m worried about you. Maybe you just need a slice of bread topped with turkey and gravy...which is a SANDWICH despite it’s lack of “roof!” Get it together, man!