Drool
Photo: William Grant & Sons (PRNewsfoto)

Citing what they describe as “voracious global demand,” Hendrick’s Gin has unveiled a $17 million distillery expansion in Girvan, Scotland, intended to double its production capacity to 2 billion million [fixed for typo] cases annually. Yeah yeah, people love gin, it’s having a moment for what feels like the millionth time. What really matters here is that the Hendrick’s Gin Palace is a magical gin faerie wonderland and I need to go there immediately.

First, what shall it do for the gin? Per a press release, the “engine of innovation” will allow Master Distiller Lesley Gracie to experiment with new variants of the cucumber- and rose-infused gin. Two still houses now serve as a home for six stills, including an original Bennett antique copper pot still (1860) and a Carter Head still (1948), as well as exact replicas of each. Gracie, on her fancy-ass new facilities:

“I’ve been distilling Hendrick’s for almost twenty years and during that time, my team and I have had the opportunity to explore and experiment on a small scale. However, I’m thrilled and excited to take full advantage of our wonderful new distillery and begin working on a line of experimental liquids, some of which will hopefully blossom into future releases and potential new expressions of Hendrick’s.”

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Now, to the travel porn: amidst the gorgeous rolling freakin’ hills of this picturesque-as-hell landscape stands a “mysterious and enchanting walled garden,” and like anyone who has ever read The Secret Garden, I am already hooked, please let me know where to send my money and is there a campsite? The garden leads to a Victorian-inspired, glittering glass palm house (pictured above). It’s flanked by two botanical hot houses, which will furnish Gracie and her team with “a plethora of unusual botanicals and flora from around the world.” Inside is a “flavour library,” a lecture theatre where one can presumably learn about distilling and juniper berries and how to create a gin-making facility designed to make spirits writers drool and jibber, and a bar.

It’s a big day for alcohol-related tourism, as Forbes also ran a story about the newly re-opened Cavalier Hotel in Virginia Beach. The remodeled hotel is now home to a distillery where you can make your own whiskey blend. If anyone would like to tap my forehead with a magic wand and make me instantly independently wealthy, or at least a person who can travel for free, I would very much appreciate it.