You have to respect the way that Declan Evans chose to combat quarantine-related boredom last summer. The 20-year-old from Lincolnshire, UK, aimed to set a Guinness World Record, and that’s exactly what he managed to do last August. This week, Evans spoke with The Lincolnite (h/t to Food And Wine for highlighting the interview) about his achievement: Fastest time to drink a Capri Sun, in 16.65 seconds.
If that doesn’t sound like some incredibly speedy sipping (I’m sure you’ve all seen someone shotgun a beer much faster), there were official rules involved in setting the record that make those 16.65 seconds mightily more impressive: first, the challenger “must start with both hands placed on the table surface.” Only when the stopwatch starts can they pick up the Capri Sun, unwrap the little straw, pierce the pouch, and start sipping. “All liquid must be consumed using the straw,” the rules state. “None may be spilled.” Do any of you remember just now narrow a Capri Sun straw is? Those things could barely let a human hair slip through. My mouth starts hurting just thinking about the speed and force with which Evans must have sucked the juice through one of those things.
Whoever wrote the official rules also seems to understand the frustration of never quite being able to finish a pouch of Capri Sun, because the challenge is considered valid even if the straw didn’t catch every last drop. “It is accepted that up to 2.5ml may still be found in the pouch after it is normally drunk,” the rules allow. “Once the attempt had ended, the contents of the pouch must be poured into a 2.5 ml measuring spoon.” Any more than that, though, and the challenger is disqualified. Guinness isn’t here to play.
“It is a stupid record to hold, but that is the fun of the Guinness World Records,” Evans told The Lincolnite. “It is a silly record anyone can try, but I am proud to have it and it is still a world record.”
Evans is currently eyeing additional world records for which Guinness has set benchmarks but have not yet been attempted. One that he’s interested in attempting is the quickest time to run a mile while carrying someone on a stretcher—a challenge that could use the quick, sugary fuel of a Capri Sun or two.