At this Chinese takeout restaurant, the customer is not always right

Illustration for article titled At this Chinese takeout restaurant, the customer is not always right
Photo: SOPA Images / Contributor (Getty Images)

All the small business owners I know, especially restaurant owners, are in a constant battle with online reviewers. Just when you think someone can’t find something new to complain about, they do—it’s impressive, but not in a good way. A Chinese takeout restaurant owner in West Yorkshire, England, has had it with the shitty reviews and is clapping back big time, according to Indy100.

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Alice Cheung, the owner of Oriental Express, has no patience for customers wedging all sorts of dumb complaints into their reviews. So she has taken up replying to the most ridiculous ones, like when one customer said that the food was “terrible.”

Cheung’s response? “You ordered a Vegetarian Munch Box and then called the shop to complain there was no MEAT in it.” Slam dunk to the face! Cheung continued, “We sent what you ordered and there was nothing wrong with it. The bad review is to cover your error. Please do not call again.”

Another online review from a different customer said that their meal was “not good, soggy and old,” and they ended up tossing most of it in the garbage; they also commented that Oriental Express was more expensive than their regular Chinese takeout spot. Cheung responded, “I suggest you stay with the other takeaway and take your false review with you.”

One screenshot of a review from a customer, “Laura,” reads: “The food was terrible. I ordered a chicken dish and got small pieces of battered fried chicken mixed in with battered prawns totally ruined this dish. Good thing I’m not allergic to prawns. I won’t be ordering from them again.”

The restaurant response is more gold: “Hi Laura, will you please open your eyes and read the descriptions, you ordered the ‘Special sweet and sour’ which contains king prawns. You got what you ordered so how is this our fault? The food was fresh and perfectly cooked. We are good but mind reading the stupid is not one of our skills.”

This isn’t how most business owners would choose to respond to their reviews, but it’s definitely eye-catching and entertaining when they do. I bet there’s some of you thinking about doing the same thing.

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Staff writer at The Takeout. Also: Saveur Humor Blog Award Winner, professional pizza maker, and insufferable troublemaker.

DISCUSSION

priest-of-maiden
Priest of Maiden

At this Chinese takeout restaurant, the customer is not always right

I dealt with customers for 15 years. The customer is almost never right.

Cheung’s response? “You ordered a Vegetarian Munch Box and then called the shop to complain there was no MEAT in it.” Slam dunk to the face! Cheung continued, “We sent what you ordered and there was nothing wrong with it. The bad review is to cover your error. Please do not call again.”

This isn’t how most business owners would choose to respond to their reviews

More should respond this way.