Baby's reward for being born in Chick-Fil-A is free nugs for rest of her goddamn life

Illustration for article titled Babys reward for being born in Chick-Fil-A is free nugs for rest of her goddamn life
Photo: David L. Ryan (The Boston Globe/Getty Images)

Imagine you’re Gracelyn Griffin, born Tuesday in San Antonio, 16 years into the future. She walks into a Chick-Fil-A with friends, they’re ordering fried chicken sandwiches and her pals reach for their wallets. Griffin holds up a hand and just says: “I got this.” Her friends shoot a puzzled look and ask: “How?” Griffin just points to where she’s standing and says: “I was born in this mufuh.”

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That’s right: Gracelyn Griffin won some sort fast-food cosmic lottery this week, as her mother gave birth to her in a Chick-Fil-A bathroom in Texas. According to KSAT-TV, Falon Griffin began experiencing contractions Tuesday night and was rushed to the hospital by her husband when she cried out that the baby won’t wait. They pulled over to a Chick-Fil-A—which happens to be one of their favorite restaurants—and soon after, little Gracelyn entered the world steps away from the Polynesian sauce and Spicy Chicken Sandwich. What’s more: Just three months earlier, Gracelyn’s parents bought a baby onesie from the restaurant that reads “Little Nugget.”

But let’s not bury the lede: For the price of not having medically trained staff nearby and the excruciating pain of her mother giving birth without pain-killers, Gracelyn Griffin has won herself free Chick-Fil-A for the rest of her life (and less enticing, a guaranteed job at age 14).

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This is exactly the type of good PR Chick-Fil-A needs today, after news that they’re getting rid of their cow calendars in 2019, to the consternation of dozens.

Kevin Pang was the founding editor of The Takeout, and director of the documentary For Grace.

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DISCUSSION

PalestinianChicken

One-Upping the Stakes: What do I does my kid get if he/she is both conceived and delivered at a Chick-Fil-A?