Lillian Stone's posts

My fellow staff writer Allison Robicelli typically covers The Takeout’s Robot Patrol. Unfortunately, Robicelli…

It’s sandwich time. You’ve opened your bread bag, selected a slice or two, and placed the packaged loaf back on the…

A tattoo is a powerful form of self-expression. You can get Tweety Bird tattooed on your butt cheek to let future…

Update, April 15, 2021: Oyez! Oyez! Oyez! Get your refresh finger ready! Jeni’s is trying online sales again today,…

Netflix reality show The Circle debuted last year, described as a “social experiment where online players flirt,…

When I think “getaway vehicle,” I imagine two options. First, something discreet, like a beige 1997 Geo Metro…

Here, let’s do some Tuesday mathematics. If I turn 27 this year, and I’ve eaten Special K Vanilla Almond cereal for…

Ah, the Masters! The storied tournament during which the world’s top golfers flock to Augusta, Georgia to compete…

Forget the ice cream truck—I’d rather scream in pursuit of a roaming cheese vessel. That dream is now a reality for…

I’ve extolled the virtues of pre-mixed seasonings before. Seasoning and sauce mixes aren’t just a weapon in the lazy…

As someone who’s spent a lot of time playing with those Freestyle soda dispensers, I can confidently say that Diet…

Happy Monday, milk chuggers. If you woke up excited to suck down a hearty serving of dairy—only to be dissuaded by…

Fellow staff writer Dennis Lee and I joined The Takeout in October, so we’ve never met in person. Actually, I’ve…

Baseball season is officially here, which means peanuts, Cracker Jack, ballpark franks—and, for one lucky left…

Please, for the love of God: if you choose to dine at a restaurant right now, the very least you can do is tip your…

Animals scoff at the laws of man. Just now, I noticed two fat pigeons making a nest on my windowsill. Do the pigeons…

We’ve all had to get a little creative when it comes to quarantine pastimes. Personally, I ordered 10 packages of…

Welcome to Gamer Week, in which The Takeout will be celebrating the edible side of video games all week long.

Today I learned about the “crisp sandwich,” one of Britain’s most ingenious small pleasures. It is, quite simply,…

Consider this the first official memo from the Ketchup-Loving Adults Club (KLAC). As the club’s self-appointed…