Sometimes, I’m jolted from a deep, dreamless sleep as I remember that alligators are a thing. They’re just out here, hanging out in swamps and mini golf courses, shimmying freely as the rest of us watch in horror. I know they’re an important part of swampland ecosystems, but dang, those guys are scary. And this week, we’ve heard of not one, but two alligator encounters at U.S. dining establishments.
Food & Wine reported on the first incident, which took place at a Wendy’s in Lehigh Acres, Florida. According to the Lee County Sheriff’s Department, the seven-foot gator “chased pedestrians through a Wendy’s parking lot” on Monday afternoon. “He may have just been ‘hangry’ for a cheeseburger, but he gave many quite the scare,” the Sheriff’s Department tweeted. God! No! No, sir!
Local news source WFLA reported that the cops and a “nuisance alligator trapper” (cool job) from the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission eventually trapped the alligator across the street from the Wendy’s. The alligator has since been spirited away to an alligator farm, where he’ll live out the rest of his days with his terrifying brethren.
The second incident took place yesterday. East Texas news station KLTV reported that an 8-foot-long alligator showed up at the Jucy’s Taco location in Henderson, Texas. KLTV reported that the gator slithered out of Willow Creek Lake, which is located behind the business, and proceeded to loiter casually in the taco joint’s parking lot. The local game warden told KLTV that he wrangled the gator with the help of a few Henderson police officers, transporting the scaly dude to a slough located along the Sabine River bottom.
Glad to hear both of the gators were transported to more appropriate hangout spots. The only question that remains: do these events indicate some sort of larger alligator collusion? Did the nation’s gators put their heads together and plan a series of fast food heists? Stay vigilant, citizens.