Oh, you thought SantaCon was the worst of all possible worlds? Behold, FieriCon.
The second annual event will see brochachos dressed as Guy Fieri bar crawl their way through Midtown beginning at 1 p.m. on Saturday, November 18. The bleached masses will congeal at 1 p.m. at The Hog Pit, then move to Pioneers Bar, Stout NYC Flagship, and The Keg Room, in case you need to know where not to be.
FieriCon begs but one question: Porque? It bills itself as “a collection of Guy Fieri enthusiasts who are going on a bar crawl in his honor.” It’s unclear why Fieri needs honoring or why a bar crawl is the appropriate tribute, but maybe the permanent residents of Flavortown know something we don’t.
As with any good (read: horrid) bar crawl, costumes are encouraged. The site offers a handy how-to-Fierify-yourself page, plus Fieri memes, and other barbecue-sauce-covered content. For some time, we’ve wondered what Guy Fieri ever did to provoke all of America’s ridicule. In searching for photos of Fieri in our photo archive, we came across endless shots of Fieri with Special Olympic athletes and involved with some children’s charity. Even the editor of this very site has had lovely run-ins with Mayor Flavortown:
If we’ve been searching for a reason to direct our venom, we have our answer: He spawned a Midtown bar crawl.