

I am fascinated with everything in a can. I’ve tried a peanut butter and jelly sandwich from a can (a little disappointing since it was just packets of peanut butter, jelly, and bread), canned silkworms, quail eggs, turtle soup, pork brains, and plenty more things that I’ve forgotten, probably because I ate those pork brains. I still have not found the legendary cheeseburger in a can.
All this being said, I went down a Twitter rabbit hole after Takeout contributor John Carruthers tweeted the following:
So, naturally, I had to click through to this Twitter account, @Cannedmeats1, new as of mid-November, and have been subsequently delighted by the content. This mysterious user tastes canned meats and methodically reviews them, like this Sweet Sue’s Whole Canned Chicken:

*$13 for 48 AA, $12 for 48 AAA, $8 for 20 AAA, $8 for four 9V batteries
If you know me personally, then you know that I am not only obsessed with this chicken, but I have already tried it twice, both to my disgust and to my delight. Part of the review involves the account owner’s dog, who also weighs in on things like conch, Vienna sausages, and fish.
While the account is fairly new, there’s a lot of fun stuff on it, the reviews are genuine, and it’s got the appeal of unboxing videos plus the fascination of those mukbang eating videos at the same time. So go ahead, have some fun, enjoy some canned meat—and that reminds me, I’ve got a couple cans of smoked oysters that are waiting for me after I’m done writing this.
DISCUSSION
OK I realize I have too much to say about canned meat for a healthy person.
1) The evening after my divorce I got a can of spam and some Old Style because that is what old divorced guys eat. Never again.
2) I used to be a foster parent and all of my kids would beg for cans of Vienna sausages when we went to the dollar store. I never understood why until a case worker pointed out that this was probably one of the few places the kids got protein when they were with their bio families.
3) Back when I was young and poor my family used to get government commodities like cheese, rice, milk and canned meats. The pork chunks in a gelatinous sauce was always a treat.