Russell Westbrook trades large shoe for slice of pizza, gets stiffed on the pizza

Gif: YouTube

One of the most consistently entertaining (and ever-present) sports narratives is this: Mr. Talented Player gets snubbed, dissed, trash-talked, or otherwise disrespected; Mr .Talented Player becomes somewhat irate; Mr. Talented Player goes off and scores just a whole bunch of points. Mr. Russell Westbrook is a particular master of the form. But Mr. Russell Westbrook has a side much softer than that of The Guy Who Will Humiliate You With Basketball. He also trades shoes for children’s pizza, without taking the pizza.


This particular transaction—or half a transaction—happened Sunday night, when Westbrook’s Oklahoma City Thunder where playing the Phoenix Suns at home. Before the game, Westbrook saw the kid with a big, greasy slice, and tried to bargain it away from him, offering a giant shoe in exchange. Complex reports:

“I had a conversation with him, just asked him if he wanted to switch the pizza for the shoe,” Russ said after the game. “He decided to keep it.” When he was asked how the traded ended up (hard-hitting journalism!), he admitted “I actually came out on the very low end of the trade.”

Just watch this cute shit.

Now, to be fair to the tiny, pizza-hoarding moppet, it sure does look like Russ waves the kid off when he tries to hand him the half-eaten slice. That’s also very nice, but it’s not exactly the kid “deciding to keep it,” and is more the kid “being allowed to keep it.” Still, that’s a weird trade, and Westbrook definitely came out worse for it.

Now, I wouldn’t call that “disrespect,” but afterwards Westbrook did score 23 points. Not a whole ton of points exactly, but enough to sting a little.


Oh, that’s nice.


Contributor, The A.V. Club and The Takeout. Allison loves TV, bourbon, and overanalyzing social interactions. Please buy her book, How TV Can Make You Smarter (Chronicle, 2020). It’s short!


Bart Fargo

I have nothing to add to this conversation other than the fact that I once met Russell Westbrook on Halloween night in New Orleans and that he almost immediately left with one of my female friends for a night of intercoursing. The best part was that she didn’t even know he was a gold medal-winning NBA All-Star and just liked him because he was tall.