5 Food Items We Would Rather Leave Santa On Christmas Eve

Kids have been leaving cookies and milk out for Santa for nearly 100 years. But after a century or so, this snack is probably starting to pall. Any kind of holiday cookie, ranging from classic jam thumbprints to more modern, trendy takes on the tradition like cran-rosemary corn cookies (winner of our 2021 holiday cookie contest), is something he's no doubt seen a zillion times, so he's probably pretty sick of it by now. In the interest of improving our haul, we've been trying to come up with something new to feed Saint Nick. He doesn't have time for a sit-down steak dinner and he seems too down-to-earth for champagne and caviar. (Plus, if he comes home reeking of Dom Perignon, the more egalitarian elves might go on strike... who are we kidding, sparkling wine from Aldi is all we could afford to offer him.)

Looking for something a bit different, we start off by exploring his own roots, thinking we'll give him a little taste of home with European-inspired treats. We then venture a bit farther afield, since after all, Santa travels around the world, so he's probably got pretty sophisticated taste buds. In fact, a world traveler like him wouldn't bat an eye at the thought of celebrating with treats usually associated with a different winter holiday, so we added a few of those, too. At the end of the day, though, we found ourselves concerned about his jolly old health, so we finished up with something a bit more nutritious than his usual sugary fare.

Many of our most beloved Christmas traditions seem to have come from the U.K., including sending Christmas cards and putting presents under a decorated Christmas tree. Not to mention all of the Dickensian Christmas tropes, as these are taken straight from the pages of the Victorian-era British novelist who brought us Ebenezer Scrooge. Santa Claus, too, has some British roots as a Father Christmas character dating back to the 15th century. In honor of this part of his heritage, we thought he might enjoy a spot of tea.

We're not talking tea alone, as in the beverage of brewed leaves or herbs (although Santa doesn't strike us as an herbal guy unless you're talking peppermint tea). No, we mean tea as in the meal, although not a full-on high tea complete with that British favorite, beans on toast. Instead, we're thinking more along the lines of an afternoon tea-ish light snack of scones with homemade clotted cream and jam. If Santa prefers something savory, we can always add a few finger sandwiches or bake up a batch of our bloody Mary scones.

The Saint Nicholas known to hagiography was a bishop in fourth-century Turkey (although the land was yet to be known by that name), but he evolved into his jolly old, red-suited alter ego by way of a Dutch figure called Sinterklaas. He was the first proto-Santa to come down chimneys and put gifts in stockings, although he sometimes left them in shoes, as well. When Dutch settlers arrived in the New World, they brought Sinterklass with them, and it's here that he ditched the bishop's miter for a stocking cap and red suit and gained his reindeer-drawn sleigh. In a nod to Santa's Dutch ancestry, we thought it appropriate to honor him with a snack from the Netherlands. Even though olliebollen are typically eaten to ring in the New Year, their season lasts all winter long.

Fun fact about Dutch: Of all the major world languages, it's actually the closest to English. It's no surprise, then, to find that "olliebollen" translates to "oil balls," although that description isn't quite literal since it omits any mention of dough. Essentially, olliebollen are like deep-fried doughnut holes which some cooks compare to beignets. They're usually made with diced apples in the dough and may or may not include raisins. Is Santa fond of dried grapes, or is he on Team Raisin Hater? To avoid the lump of coal that lies in wait if you choose wrong, we'd play it safe with one batch of each.

Even if Santa does have European origins, he's a man of the world now and might appreciate some diversity in his holiday noshing. In the Philippines, it just wouldn't be Christmas without bibingka, even though this dish isn't as well known in the U.S., where many Filipino food offerings seem to begin and end with lumpia or Jollibee. Bibingka are sweet (but not too sweet) cakes made with fermented sticky rice and coconut milk which are traditionally baked in clay pots lined with banana leaves. Bibingka vendors often set up outside churches to feed hungry parishioners streaming out of Simbang Gabi, which is a nine-day series of early morning masses leading up to Christmas.

Should you be lucky enough to live near a Filipino bakery, you're likely to find bibingka on the menu, especially around Christmas time. (Be sure to buy a big batch, since Santa's sure to want seconds.) Those of us who aren't so fortunate, though, can always buy packaged bibingka mix online. As an accompanying beverage, Santa might enjoy a Filipino beer like Red Horse, but it's pretty strong stuff. Since he's driving, he'd probably be better off with a nice glass of Milo, which is Southeast Asia's answer to Nesquik.

Santa Claus is, of course, associated with Christmas, a holiday celebrated by Christian denominations. Over the years, however, the 1700-year-old Turkish bishop seems to have evolved into a pretty ecumenical fellow who doesn't mind being a global ambassador of goodwill for people of all religions. As Hanukkah occurs within a few weeks of Santa's big day (at times, the dates even overlap), we thought it appropriate to greet Santa with a plate of latkes (and maybe a few chocolate gelt coins, as well).

Latkes, which are pancakes made of grated potatoes, hold symbolic value because they are fried in oil, thus harking back to the original Hanukkah miracle where a single day's worth of oil kept temple lamps lit for a full eight days. Oil is what also makes them delicious, as we're sure that Santa (and Paula Deen) would agree. Offering latkes as a snack allows us to provide Santa with a choice of sweet or savory toppings since both applesauce and sour cream are de rigueur for these pancakes. While most latke eaters tend to have a strong preference for one or the other, we can see Santa opting for a bit of both.

We'd never want to wind up on the naughty list by body-shaming Santa (nor are we in any position to do so), but he does seem to subsist on a fairly unhealthy diet. Okay, maybe he's eating vegan or keto 364 days out of the year and December 24th is just one big cheat day for him, but what if it isn't? Back in 1823, Clement C. Moore's poem "A Visit from St. Nicholas" described him as having "a little round belly that shook when he laughed, like a bowlful of jelly." But as he's typically portrayed these days, his abdomen seems to have expanded over the years. 

Belly fat may be linked to hazards including diabetes, heart disease, and stroke and we wouldn't want to ruin Christmas by providing the cookie that broke the camel's back. While we considered leaving ants on a log as a lighter snack, we never did establish whether St. Nick's a raisin hater, so we settled on the safer alternative of raw vegetables.

Okay, so maybe not just vegetables alone. Cut-up vegetables do sound fancier if you call them crudités, but they're more ho-hum than ho-ho-ho. With the right dip, though, they suddenly taste a lot better. Since we're trying to stay healthy, we won't go with anything fatty like mayonnaise-based ranch or that '70s staple, sour cream and onion. Instead, we might make twice-cooked eggplant dip or homemade hummus. If we're in a hurry, though, we could always combine bottled marinade with Greek yogurt for a delicious two-ingredient dip.