Nov. 12 Update: Australian authorities have arrested a 50-year-old woman in connection with a string of incidents where needles were inserted into fruit, sparking nationwide fears across Australia. CNN is reporting the arrest took place on Sunday in Queensland after what was described as a “complex investigation.”…
Here in the Midwest, there’s an appealing crispness in the air, and perfectly sane people who would commonly have no interest in anything so festive are chirping about apple-picking and hay rides and strolling down the street wearing sweaters over plaid collared shirts. There is no bad season to eat a baked potato,…
The Australian produce crisis, which began with some sick bastard (or bastards) hiding needles in strawberries, continues. Since we first reported on this story on September 17, needles have been found in mangoes, bananas, and apples. Produce has been disposed of by the ton. At least one person has eaten a…
When we were kids, the threat of someone putting razor blades in apples turned out to be an urban legend. But this is much worse, because it’s real, and widespread: The Washington Post reports that in Australia “someone is placing sewing needles inside strawberries—endangering those who eat them and sending panic…
Pineapples are having a big week. First, floating pineapples turned up on the shores of Shetland, Scotland, months after containers of the fruit were lost at sea. Now, a different kind of shipment has shown up at a food market in Madrid, where cylinders of cocaine were discovered in hollowed-out pineapples at the…
Many times the crime beat on our timely food website here is a stumper. Like this story from the Associated Press today: 59-year-old Dionicio Fierros was arrested in Southern California “after deputies found about 800 pounds of stolen lemons inside his car.” The lemons appeared to be freshly picked and were in bags.…
In 2006, Lin Keitch’s ring was lost. It was given to her for her 40th birthday by her husband, Dave, an amethyst in the shape of a heart. Her fingers outgrew it, and so she gifted it to her daughter Sarah, then in her mid-20s. Sarah then lost the ring in the garden. (Fuckin’ kids.) But when does the carrot come in,…
I make banana bread a lot. Not because I love it so much (although it does come in handy as an easy hybrid breakfast/afternoon snack). But because when I purchase bananas, there’s a pretty good chance I’m not going to use them all in time, and banana bread is the best use I know for the dreaded black banana.
I was unfamiliar with Sam O’Nella Academy’s series of humorous historical videos, but was intrigued by this trending video today on “Why Produce Sucked.” Basically, modern fruit and vegetables got to be the way they are via scientific selective breeding, so much so that it’s like starting with a frog and then ending…
George Orwell’s novel 1984 predicted that Big Brother would be watching. Now that the future is here, it turns out everyone is. In the world of readily available cameras and social media postings, you really can’t expect to get away with much anymore. As the McDonald’s employee who forgot she was on mic and had her…
The trend of mini-avocados was recently announced, but now it appears that avocado fans can go the opposite route. In Australia—where everything does seem to be larger for some reason—some savvy farmers are harvesting the “avozilla,” or an avocado that could substitute as a really messy bowling ball. According to The…
We’re usually too busy shopping at the grocery store to spend any time on pranks (we can barely squeeze in a free grape sample). But as Mashable and other outlets have pointed out, TV writer Kevin Biegel is much more creative than we are:
Another reminder to carefully rinse wash your produce: Ohio resident Jacob Vaughn found a surprising stowaway in his recently purchased broccoli from Kroger: a black-widow spider. As WTOL in Toledo explains, quoting an interview with an expert from Scientific American, spiders may be found in your grocery-store fruit,…
I love avocados, but am frustrated by them just as much. It seems like no matter what I do to purchase them at the peak of ripeness, unless I use them within the perfect minutes-long window, they edge into unappealing brown territory, and then I have to toss them.
Over the past several weeks, the recent E. coli outbreak related to chopped, bagged romaine lettuce spread to 32 states, made 172 people sick, and resulted in at least one death. At one point, the CDC just advised throwing your bagged salad mixes away. But now The New York Times reports that “Federal health officials…
Like many people who work in an office, we here at Onion Inc. use Slack frequently, for everything from “where in the hell is that article?” (using nicer language), to vote on what we should get for lunch for the weekly staff meeting. (Also, to track cute dog Instagrams and various Mueller investigation updates.)…
